I got a few stink eyes from the Po Po as I rolled down my street.

The curse of turgid prose haunts many bloggers, but Ben Holder is not among their number.

His vigorous pursuit of a robbery suspect suggests that the rum-and-coke diet could be the next big fitness craze.

Comments

[David Wharton]

"[V]ibrant criminal environment". That's good writing.

[Ben Holder]

Dear Mr. Cone,

I am very honored and somewhat surprised to learn that you have noticed a post from my blog. I did have to Google “turgid prose” and I am glad I don’t suffer from that. I would also like to thank Dr. Wharton for his comments.

Even though I am very honored by being included as a post on your blog, I feel the need to set the record straight about a few items.

1. I do train and have a wonderful personal trainer and we train rambunctiously. I don’t want people to think they can just smash a few rum and cokes and become a neighborhood crime fighter. It takes a lot of hard work and dedication. I actually trained with my trainer, Jen Riordan, early this morning. So, when the suspect shot through the back yard I was already feeling a tad frisky.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=6505501&ref=ts

2. I also am gifted with the natural talent of being fast. I am fast. Roch (Gso 101) and Bill (not a blogger) were going to the ABC store one time with me (I was not driving) and conversation came up about speed. I took this opportunity to jump out of Roch’s vehicle and sprinted down the sidewalk in front of the Weaver Center. I don’t wanna brag but Roch said he was impressed. Do you know how hard Roch is to impress?

3. I do not drink rum and cokes anymore and have not had one in years. I drink moonshine and on occasion I’ll have a double shot of Captains “neat” with a small coke.

[Ed Cone]

So the key, beyond training with Jen Riordan and being graced by one's maker with natural speed, is to differentiate between rum-and-cokes, on the one hand, and rum and a coke, on the other.

Captain Miller, please inform your officers.

[David Hoggard]

I know, from first-hand experience that Mr. Holder holds some pretty fine moonshine from time to time.

(I do believe that is just committed some damn fine alliteration - add that to your next effort at turgid prose, Mr. Holder)

[Roch101]

"I don’t wanna brag but Roch said he was impressed."

Impressed as much that you did not stumble and crack your skull as by your lightening speed but, yes, impressed, I attest.

[Roch101]

"Captain Miller, please inform your officers."

I think he's under the command of Captain Morgan, as I recall.

[Ben Holder]

It's Chief Miller! Show a lil respect, boys! Show a lil respect!